Oh no, I think it's coming from... my brain!
On Monday I somehow managed to sit down and bust out the editing of 6 chapters, almost nonstop.
That included taking a small paragraph of descriptive thought and turning it into a nice chunk of dialogue. (Writing dialogue is my "uhg" moment, so this was quite an accomplishment). I also wrote in more to another scene that managed to get my hubby to cringe and say "Oh, what a creeper." I think that's a win there!
Let me tell you, by the end of that day, I felt fried. I honestly think you could see the smoke curling from my ears, the last remnant of my now charred brain just pile of soot. I forced myself to close the notes, put away the bleeding pages and turn off the computer. My head hit my pillow, and I was gone.
Oh, but it felt so good. So so good.
Kinda funny what actually brings joy to us writers, isn't it?
Now, since then I haven't seen much editing time. My three year old is on an all-time high of "must make messes and talk back and run run run!" so my hands are full. By the end of Tuesday (yesterday) I was so worn out from mommy-hood that I couldn't even will myself to glance at my book.
My goal for the week?:
I am aiming to get enough done that by this Sunday I just might be comfortable enough to send out some of those -gasp- query letters. Scary thought there. But it is something that needs to be done. I keep putting it off because, well, it scares the crud right out of me.
I know as writers we have to be strong and ready. We are in the face of a ton of rejection, and very little acceptance. It's just a fact of the writing life. Still, we dream of people loving us. Of seeing this baby of ours and adoring it so much that they can't NOT pick it up and love it and share it. Or at least tell us we are awesome and give us a great high five. Either way. The fact that I am about to put myself in that spot where, it seems more often than not, I will get the "no thank you" response... uhg...
But the show must go on!
And on it will go.
Someone tell my brain, and my three year old, to work with me here.
Nathan Bransford posted a great post this week about separating confidence from self-doubt. I think he channeled my thoughts lately and wrote that post just for me. (Hey now. I am allowed to be selfish every so often, right?) If you haven't read it yet, give it a good scan. I loved it.
"Confidence will give you the strength to doubt yourself."
And of course... Keep writing!